The Best Kept Relationship Secret

Happy Valentine’s Day! Perfect day to post about relationship stuff 🙂

What do you look for in a guy? How do you know if he is the one? If you don’t date, how do you know what to look for?

I get these questions a loooot. The answer is simple. God. It may seem silly or weird to some of you but I 100% depend on God in that area of my life. He is way more seasoned than me and will never disappoint. I think God is the biggest kept secret to making any relationship work.

How can you tell if a guy is with you for the wrong reasons? Or why do girls turn crazy after a couple months of dating? Asked a few friends what they look for in their significant other, this is what I got: loves God, humor, good heart, determination, faith, patience, sex, humility and honesty. Deal breakers:  disrespect, arrogance , pride, no relationship with God, selfish…

Consider our lack of discernment, caused by so many things…feelings are one of them. Some might be obvious, but would you really be able to see any any of the above if you don’t have discernment? (Philippians 1:9-10)

I read this in a book once: think of your relationship with God and your future spouse as a triangle. God at the top point, you two at the two other points. As you get closer to God, you get closer to each other. Once God is done preparing you for each other, bam. It will happen in His timing. God’s timing is always the right timing even if it may not seem like it.

If you’re one of those peeps that thinks v-day is “single awareness day”…good. Now, go bask in your singleness 🙂 What better time to do everything God has called you to do as an individual. All your cares should be for things that belong to the Lord, how you can please Him..but when you’re married, you have to also care about “things of the world”, how you may please your spouse. 1 Corinthians 7:32-34. I hope you can see the awesomeness in being single.

If you’re in a relationship, *smiley with the ❤ eyes”, I am happy for you 🙂 I hope you’re enjoying this season in your life. You should be! If not, take a step back and think about it. Are you where God wants you to be right now? He’s got your back so just go to Him.

A few more thoughts:

1. Ask God to choose your spouse for you, to give you eyes and a heart only for the one that he wants you to be with. I’ll be happy with whomever God chooses for me, He can do a much better job than I can haha. Yes, there are manyyy choices and you can make it work with more than one person, but I think there is a special someone God has called for you to be with to accomplish a purpose in His kingdom here together.

2. Ask God for what you want but also ask God to help you only desire what He has in store for you. Pray for your future wifey/hubby.

3. Pray about any relationship you’re thinking about beginning, ask God for confirmation. Asking someone to be your gf should be a big deal. (And girls, you pray too.) God should get all the glory from your relationship.

4. Stay pure. Y’all know what I mean here. If you’re not married, you have not entered a covenant relationship with each other…you don’t “belong” to each other yet. 1 Corinthians 7:2-4  You are a holy vessel, do you want to defile the things of God? 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 I know this is much easier said than done, but the strength to overcome temptation only lies in the Holy Spirit.  He loves us so much that He already forgave us and gave us this power to overcome when he died on the cross.

Love you all lots! God loves you so much more. Happy days 🙂

❤ Rinny

Late Night Thinking…

Group think! Why do groups of young girls, teens, young ladies, grown women tend to choose someone to dislike, bring down, shoot down together?  I’m not sure I’ll ever fully understand…

This is so random but it was on my mind as I was getting ready for bed some time ago. I mentor a middle school girl who is smart, at the top of her class, well spoken, athletic, hard worker…etc. She’s focused and has set goals, her passions are so clear, its admirable. The stories she’s told me always shock me…girls want to fight her.

My advice to her: When you stand for something, are confident, won’t compromise your values or who you are for others, people feel threatened, annoyed, they want you to conform. You exhibit what they wish they had in them.

Speaking from experience, I’ve seen girls act crazy on other girls for no reason. None. And it never ceases to shock me. And I know people will say, “Well it’s not them, it’s her…why do people always have a problem with her?” Wrong. Look at the people saying that, usually they are intimidated, immature, feel inferior, want attention…one and/or all of the above.

Just remember,  everything happens for a reason. God put em in your life for a season and took em out for a reason. I’ve got a few stories of my own. Teaches you character, lessons learned, wisdom and knowledge gained. Don’t cling to things that aren’t meant to be. You won’t miss that “friendship” one bit.

If you walk with God, who can be against you? Romans 8:31 (I love Romans 8:28-31!) I think this goes for guys/men too even though its not always as blatant.

Y’all know I love open discussions soo share your thoughts 🙂